Recovery
by lydiaking17
Summary: Arthur knows he has to come clean about his past to save his relationship with Eames, even if it will be the most difficult thing he has ever done.
1. Chapter 1

Recovery

Cold, lonely and desperate, they would be the best words to describe the way Arthur felt right at that moment. He was all alone in his bleak apartment with his blanket half on half off him while he sobbed about losing the only good thing in his life, but he knew he deserved to go through this after all it was him who had pushed Eames away, it was him who had the problem. The problem that Arthur had stemmed from his childhood, when he was Neil McCormack, the problem exactly was that Arthur refused to get close or open up to anyone not even the man he loved. This was because if he opened up to someone about his past it became real all over again, it was too hurtful to dig up and Arthur had always just ignored that part of his life in a hope it would go away. But of course it never did.

And so when Eames finally snapped after a year and a half of putting up with Arthur refusing to answer any personal questions about himself, his past or his childhood Arthur really wasn't surprised. He knew how much it hurt Eames, he knew how much the forger took this personally like Arthur couldn't trust him. Eames loved Arthur and Arthur loves Eames. As soon as he thinks the word **love** he burst out crying and is reminded of what exactly Eames was for him, and he hopes Eames still is for him. Before the argument he was Arthurs rock, his support system , he was Arthurs comic relief when he was stressed, he was the one who kept Arthur warm during those cold nights, he was the one who made sure Arthur was eating properly and sleeping during the more difficult jobs, he was the one who filled the gap in Arthurs heart, but most importantly he was Arthurs soul mate.

Arthur knew he would have to come clean about his childhood in order to save their relationship, if it was still able to be saved. But the thought of finally opening up to someone about it nearly gave him a panic attack. After all the only person who knew about what horrible things Arthur went through as a child was Mal. Arthur never openly told mal but she had a way of reading people in certain situations and only after knowing Arthur for a month confronted him about it. He must have cried for hours and Mal was their every second holding and comforting him. Mal was their when Arthur had to revisit his old neighbourhood for his father's funeral, Mal was their when Arthur used to have bad nightmares and wake up crying, Mal was their whenever Arthur needed to talk to someone and now that she was gone Arthur couldn't talk to anyone about it. No-one else here knew what had happened to him and he intended to keep it that way. But now it looked like Eames might finally hear the story of how Arthur became the cool, calm and collected emotionless point man he is today.

Arthur picked up the phone with shaky hands, dried the tears from his eyes and dialled Eames number that he had learned by heart. Eames answered after the second ring.

"Hello Arthur what have I done to deserve this call"

Arthur didn't really know how to respond, he could sense a hint of annoyance in Eames voice and even considered hanging up but it was now or never.

"Hi Eames"

Eames must have heard the shake in his voice because the next thing out of his mouth was a very concerned "Arthur is everything alright" and just like that Arthur was babbling about how sorry he was.

"To be honest I'm not in the best, I have messed up and I feel like I have lost you but I don't want to lose you because I love you and I want to be with you and I know you deserve answers so if you would be so kind as to please come to my apartment whenever you feel like talking and I will explain everything as best I can but Eames I can't promise you will like what you hear"

"Okay I'll be there in 20 minutes alright darling?"

"Yeah okay see you then"

"Bye pet"

And just like that the line went dead and Arthur waited in the darkness, silent and bleak and thought about how in another 20 minutes he would be telling the only person he truly cares about a story that only one other person had ever known about and he wished desperately that Eames would still want him, still love him even if he was broken.


	2. Chapter 2

Exactly 20 minutes after Eames called there was a knock at the door. Eames was never one to be on time so Arthur knew that this conversation meant as much to Eames as it did to him. Arthur was wearing a tracksuit something he wouldn't normally be caught dead in but after days of moping it seemed to appropriate to the situation.

Arthur opened the door with a shaky hand and took a step back in order to see Eames clearly in the light. Eames looked like he hadn't slept in days, hadn't shaved in days or hadn't even showered in days. And all of a sudden a wave of guilt passed over Arthur. This is what he had done to Eames! The man he loved.

"Hello Eames" Arthur said when the guilt subsided a bit.

"Darling are you okay you look like you have been crying"

Arthur was shocked Eames should be mad at him for all he put him through, Eames should be angry and cold and not want to hear from Arthur but here Eames was concerned about Arthur and Arthur knew at that moment that he was going to tell Eames everything and answer all his questions no matter how hard that might be for him.

"Eames I am so sorry for all I have done to you and now if you will listen I will tell you everything you want to know about who I am"

"Pet I always listen to you and now will be no different, just take your time and now I'm hear for you"

Arthur was suddenly nervous to have all 100 per cent of Eames attention on anything he said but Arthur knew Eames loved him and that made it a lot easier to face up to his demons for what he hoped would be the last time.

Arthur started his story recounting the events that led up to his rape by his little league couch, his call boy years and eventually the beating that had made him pick himself up and start over as Arthur Piaf in the dream share business, where he inevitably met Mal and Dom the dream duo as they were known in the business.

Eames listened attentively and even offered the occasional "hmm" that told Arthur he was fully engaged in what he was saying. About half way through the story about his past Eames got up from the single chair he was sitting on and engulfed Arthur in a warm affectionate hug. They remained like that until the story was over and Arthur was sobbing breathlessly against Eames chest. Arthur was relieved Eames was still her whispering sweet nothings into his ear and telling him that everything is all right.

Looking back now Arthur realised he should have been straight with Eames in the first place, deep down he knew that Eames would never have left him because of his past and it was silly of Arthur to think otherwise. Lying beside him now in bed while they laughed like they hadn't a care in the world Arthur truly couldn't think of a place he would rather be.


End file.
